Last night my good friend Mike pointed out (in a nice way) that I wasn’t posting personal blogs anymore. I texted right back with a, “haha that’s because I’m always shooting and editing”. A quick response that kept me from looking at the ugly truth, I haven’t been blogging much, especially about me. Most people wouldn’t give it much more thought, but unfortunately, for you, and the rest of the people reading this I have one of those nagging reflective brains that’s always asking why. WHY am I avoiding writing the personal blogs? So hours later in bed, well 2 am, here are the thoughts my brain is insisting I write before bed.
1. Who really wants, or has time to read these random ramblings. I mean, I don’t even use commas correctly, and, rarely, write in, complete, sentences. It’s probably bad for your brain to read these blogs posts, and would be even worse if not for obnoxious spell check that’s always pointing out my inability to spell.
2. Do I really know myself well enough to share me? As an artist, not so much. But, as an ambitious 31 year old chick …perhaps.
3. Is it even professional to blog about my hectic, crazy, normal, life? I’m gonna go ahead and blame this insecurity on my past teaching career. They make you paranoid about everything! Oh and besides I regularly (like every time we’re out and there’s a band) get on stage and try to sing/dance with the band in front of hundreds of people, some of which might act like they don’t know me. I’ve literally forced myself on stages all over the world. And besides that, aren’t politicians suppose to be professional.
4.How will this change what my clients think of me? Well I’m pretty sure most of them are so busy with kids, they don’t read this. And I have really cool clients anyway. And if they can’t hang, then can’t hang. Period!
I guess that’s it, it’s time I start being my authentic self, no more excuses. If I’m going to figure myself out as an artist and find my vision and develop a kick ass style I’m going to have to put myself out there. I’m so having a Gerry Maguire moment while I type this. Luckily no one can fire me in the morning. Oh and the commas…deal with it. Jon says I use too many, or too few. If you’ve made it this far you probably don’t care.
Because being authentic means being real I went out and tried to find a real picture of me doing what I do. And I kinda look cool too!
Maggie took this picture of Dorian and I at a Halloween party in south Florida. We were the band 3 doors up.